Sun Worship

Tan skin is gorgeous skin. Or so we are taught to believe. In our culture, millions of dollars are spent cooking skin under special light bulbs to get that coveted glow. They even sell you tanning accelerators, which I'm sure are completely free of anything toxic. Especially the ones that burn like the dickens (the label says "tingle," but in no way is the urge to rip your skin off a reaction to tingling). It's all kind of bizarre, really. Especially because in many parts of the world millions of dollars are spent on skin lightening creams.

To me, there is beauty both in the palest porcelain skin and beauty in the deepest darkest skin tones across the world, and it drives me nuts that people don't acknowledge this. Take a good hard look at person who has had too much sun. There is nothing attractive about it. The next time someone teases you about the shade of your skin, say "thank you!"

It's about accepting what you are and rocking it with confidence. Those perfectly tanned chicks who slather on the baby oil at the beach and hit up the tanning salons on their lunch breaks in January? They'll be the ones with liver spots and hag faces. Don't be stupid... don't be one of those girls. If you're lucky, shriveled and ugly is all you'll be. Tan addicts run a huge risk of contracting skin cancer, and no glow is worth having chunks of skin removed, chemotherapy, even death.

Several people have commented that after my Caribbean cruise I "don't look very tan." I calmly explain that I have no intention of looking like a heap of leather and that I'm a fan of hats and sun protection. Sheesh. Besides, they're just crabby that their orange fake n bake isn't fooling anyone.

Anyway, please take a moment to consider the consequences of frying your skin out of some twisted form of vanity, laziness, or ignorance. Your loved ones and your future self will be grateful.